As the rain falls on this Winter Sunday afternoon I think of the tears that are welling up in the eyes of the one who is battling with addiction. This morning they were filled with hope.
They said, I won't use today, I won't deceive today, I won't call my dealer, I won't leave my kids to go "cop", but... today they found themselves doing the very thing that they said they wouldn't do.
The familiar feelings of dread, guilt and shame begins. I'm a failure, I can't believe I did it again, I might as well give up, I will never get clean and stay sober; are the prevailing thoughts. They feel trapped, beneath the bricks of addiction once again.
This is the life of a person addicted to: drugs, alcohol, gambling, food, or sex endures on a second by second basis every day. The continuous struggle is exhausting to say the least.
Today... the tears fall, because the pain is unbearable; they didn't win the battle today. "Let Me Go!" Is the internal whisper that screams in their mind; but no one knows. So please don't judge.
2nd Corinthians 3:17 "Now the Lord is the Spirit, and where the Spirit of the Lord is, there is freedom."